Arrant Nonsense

When you see this, post another Buffy quote in your LJ. Let's see how long this can go on.

Except I'm going to use an A:tS quote because that's how I roll.

SPIKE: I'm listening. With beer.

I could use a beer myownself right now...

So, I'm working on the rewrite of the BeagleFic. And I'm noticing that the frelling rewrite is taking longer than writing the original story did. The story practically wrote itself when I first did it. Right now? I'm pulling teeth. It's very frustrating.

In other news, Da Boy has been practically angelic today. Not sure what's gotten into him. *looks at him suspiciously*

And the Steelers are sucking today. Again. *cries* What happened to my team??? Yotz.

Also, you know you've been watching too much BtVS when a random stranger on an airport bus says he's going to Cleveland, and you have to bite your tongue to prevent yourself from saying, "Really? I hear they have a Hellmouth there."

I'm not cutting it, because, dude. It's just 200 words.

Title: The Curse of the Autographed Football
Author: babies stole my dingo (agilebrit)
Fandom: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Rating: G
Length: Double drabble (200 words)
Disclaimer: Joss is the genius behind these characters; I am but a lowly follower. I make no money from any of this, so please don't sue me.
Feedback: Concrit adored! If you see something that can be improved upon, please let me know, even if it's only a typo.
Written for: The Ensemble challenge at writercon. The challenge was to have an argument over a cursed football between Willow, Cordy, Giles, Xander, Buffy, and Oz. In fifteen minutes. I've added a few phrases to make it exactly 200 words, and taken out some repeated words, but it's pretty much unchanged from the original.

---

"Weird," Oz commented.

"Can't we just...I don't know...throw it away?" Willow gazed at the object worriedly.

They stood gathered around a football, but at a respectable distance from it. It spun on its axis, chomping fangs at them.

"I'm not touching it." Cordy made a face. "Because, ew. Not to mention 'ow.'"

"Just throwing it away would be imprudent," Giles said, cleaning his glasses. "A child might find it."

"How do I slay a football?" Buffy glared at it.

Xander poked at the non-toothy end with his toe. The football spun, snapping, and he withdrew hurriedly. "I think this might be more of a guy thing. Maybe a play we can run to de-curse it?"

Buffy acted as though Xander hadn't spoken. "Bound to be something I can drop on it to flatten it. Anvil, maybe? Crossbow? Nail it to the ground?"

"We can't destroy it!" Xander protested. "Joe Namath signed it!"

"Joe who?" Cordy crossed her arms defensively when Xander glowered at her. "What?"

Oz reached into his back pocket and pulled out a yellow bandana, throwing it on the grass in front of the ball. Whimpering, it recoiled, and they all stared at him. "Penalty flag," he explained.

the end

Title: Facing Fear
Author: babies stole my dingo (agilebrit)
Fandom: Buffy/Firefly crossover
Rating: PG-13 for a couple of naughty words
Length: Short story (about 4400 words)
Disclaimer: Joss is the genius behind these characters; I am but a lowly follower. I make no money from any of this, so please don't sue me.
Feedback: Concrit adored! If you see something that can be improved upon, please let me know.
Written for: inlovewithnight's Valentine's Day Fluffython. Request was from echo_of_my_soul and was for Faith/Mal. Wants: Faith captivating/mystifying Mal. No: graphic smut, mention of Mal/Inara as a 'ship. Prompt: The crew picks up a new passenger, and, for once, Mal actually likes this one...
Notes: Takes place between the comics and the movie. Inara and Book have left the ship. Thanks to Aeneas for the beta-read and making sure this didn't suck before I posted it.
( Click for fic... )

I have finished my Scatterlings and Orphanages fic. And only a day late (thanks to date confusion on my part. Looking at a calendar every once in awhile would be smrt)!

So, without further ado...

Title: Nature's Special Effects
Author: babies stole my dingo (agilebrit)
Fandom: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Rating: PG
Length: Short story (around 1500 words)
Disclaimer: Joss is the genius behind these characters; I am but a lowly follower. I make no money from any of this, so please don't sue me.
Feedback: Concrit adored! If you see something that can be improved upon, please let me know.
Written for: ludditerobot's "Scatterlings and Orphanages" Xander-in-Africa ficathon.
Notes: Much credit must go to Mauro Campagnoli, whose pictures and research among the Baka people were invaluable in helping me write this. Any errors are mine. If you want to know more about the Baka, go here. I barely scratched the surface.
( Click for fic! )

Title: Priorities
Author: babies stole my dingo (agilebrit)
Fandom: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Rating: PG
Length: Drabble (100 words)
Disclaimer: Joss is the genius behind these characters; I am but a lowly follower. I make no money from any of this, so please don’t sue me.
Written for: open_on_sunday's "Fathers" challenge.
Notes: Hank Summers' POV, post-Chosen.

---

Hank turned the news on and felt a cold clutch of fear claw his stomach. Massive earthquake in California, Sunnydale an impossibly deep crater...no known survivors.

He'd been remiss in keeping up with his daughters, he knew. Globetrotting around with the trophy wife, the parties he had to attend in order to maintain his business contacts, late nights, early mornings. Suddenly all that seemed irrelevant, faced with a world that didn't have Buffy and Dawn in it, somewhere.

He nearly sobbed with relief when his phone rang and he heard the voice on the other end. "Dad? We're okay."

And I found the original BtVS movie in the $5.50 bin. Since I loved this movie beyond all reason when it first came out, and still think it's superior to the series in many ways (I know Joss hated it, but it's still mighty fine work), and I actually had $6 to blow, I grabbed it. And what do you know? The cashier was a fan too! She was all "Oh, I'd better go find one of my own!" Even after all this time, we fans can geek out together.

And, in honor of the original movie that got the whole ball rolling and gave us eight years of wonderful stuff, I made an icon (because that's what I do).



Screencap is mine. I <3 my new computer.

On a roll today. Woot!

Title: Unlikely Enemies
Author: babies stole my dingo (agilebrit)
Fandom: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Rating: PG-13
Length: Drabble (100 words)
Disclaimer: Joss is the genius behind these characters; I am but a lowly follower. I make no money from any of this, so please don’t sue me.
Written for: open_on_sunday's "Enemies" challenge.
Notes: Set in Buffy S2 somewhere around "Becoming."

---

That sodding bloody wanker. Angelus really is more insane than poor mad Dru. A hundred years of eating rats has sent him right round the proverbial bend. They say I'm the impulsive one, but I never tried to suck the world into Hell, yeah? What are we going to eat if he does that? Don't know about him, but I'm rather fond of the occasional meal.

Unless he wants us to all go hungry and nutters. There's a lovely thought.

Unlife has come to a pretty pass when I have to make an ally of the damn Slayer.

Title: Summer Reading
Author: babies stole my dingo (agilebrit)
Fandom: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Rating: G
Length: Drabble (100 words)
Disclaimer: Joss is the genius behind these characters; I am but a lowly follower. I make no money from any of this, so please don't sue me.
Written for: inlovewithnight, who requested Xander misunderstanding his English homework.
Notes: Takes place between S2 and S3, right before Senior Year.

---

"What did you pick for your summer reading, Will?" Xander asked.

Willow was practically bouncing. "I can't believe ‘A Handmaid's Tale' is on the list! But I'm having trouble picking just one other one. I mean, there's so many good choices. How about you?"

"I picked ‘Possession' as something appropriately Hellmouthy," he replied. Her lips twitched. "What?"

"You just read the titles, and not the summaries, didn't you?"

"Well, you know. Not much for reading at the best of times. Why?" he said with sudden trepidation.

She flounced off, tossing over her shoulder in a sing-song voice: "Xander's reading romance..."

This one's for open_on_sunday.

Title: Her Sounds
Author: babies stole my dingo (agilebrit)
Fandom: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Rating: PG-13
Length: Drabble (100 words)
Disclaimer: Joss is the genius behind these characters; I am but a lowly follower. I make no money from any of this, so please don't sue me.
Written for: open_on_sunday's "Sound" challenge.
Notes: Spike contemplates the various noises Buffy makes. Set in S6.

---

The noises his Slayer makes are exquisite. Honestly, he could write poetry about them if he wanted to. The thuds and grunts as she trains, and when they spar in secret, are delicious. He loves her quips as she stakes a vampire or decapitates a demon. Her Valley-speak in casual conversation is--dare he say it--adorable. Her quiet pride when she talks about Dawn is palpable. Her moans as he holds her in his arms and makes love to her make unlife worth living.

Her cries of "Angel! Oh, Angel!"...

Well, no. That particular sound, he could live without.

---

And...the Steelers lost. *sobs uncontrollably*