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agilebrit
Title: The Curse of the Autographed Football
Author: babies stole my dingo (agilebrit)
Fandom: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Rating: G
Length: Double drabble (200 words)
Disclaimer: Joss is the genius behind these characters; I am but a lowly follower. I make no money from any of this, so please don't sue me.
Feedback: Concrit adored! If you see something that can be improved upon, please let me know, even if it's only a typo.
Written for: The Ensemble challenge at ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-community.gif){kind=small}
writercon. The challenge was to have an argument over a cursed football between Willow, Cordy, Giles, Xander, Buffy, and Oz. In fifteen minutes. I've added a few phrases to make it exactly 200 words, and taken out some repeated words, but it's pretty much unchanged from the original.
"Weird," Oz commented.
"Can't we just...I don't know...throw it away?" Willow gazed at the object worriedly.
They stood gathered around a football, but at a respectable distance from it. It spun on its axis, chomping fangs at them.
"I'm not touching it." Cordy made a face. "Because, ew. Not to mention 'ow.'"
"Just throwing it away would be imprudent," Giles said, cleaning his glasses. "A child might find it."
"How do I slay a football?" Buffy glared at it.
Xander poked at the non-toothy end with his toe. The football spun, snapping, and he withdrew hurriedly. "I think this might be more of a guy thing. Maybe a play we can run to de-curse it?"
Buffy acted as though Xander hadn't spoken. "Bound to be something I can drop on it to flatten it. Anvil, maybe? Crossbow? Nail it to the ground?"
"We can't destroy it!" Xander protested. "Joe Namath signed it!"
"Joe who?" Cordy crossed her arms defensively when Xander glowered at her. "What?"
Oz reached into his back pocket and pulled out a yellow bandana, throwing it on the grass in front of the ball. Whimpering, it recoiled, and they all stared at him. "Penalty flag," he explained.
the end
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Date: 2006-07-26 02:22 am (UTC)i have been tricked into reading fanfiction before, but this was the only time it turned out well. this was actually really funny.
it is pretty impressive that you wrote it in 15 minutes.
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Date: 2006-07-26 02:31 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-07-26 02:29 am (UTC)Very nifty little piece for 15 minutes work!
Now I'm glad I don't watch football...
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Date: 2006-07-26 02:32 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-07-26 02:42 am (UTC)I'm not sure if it's just me (I love Oz), but since he solves the issue, it might be nice to give him the first line as well as the last - kind of round it out, bring it full circle?
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Date: 2006-07-26 02:54 am (UTC)no subject
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Date: 2006-07-26 03:43 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-07-26 04:10 am (UTC)Did anyone else snicker at the thought, "Oz has a yellow hanky in his pocket"??
Extra bonus points:
Did anyone else wonder, "Was it in the left or the right pocket?"
/is twelve years old
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Date: 2006-07-26 04:14 am (UTC)And now the NSFW explanation.
Date: 2006-07-26 04:31 am (UTC)See, in Hanky Code, yellow means an interest in water sports, so to speak. Flagging a yellow hanky in the left pocket means one is a top; the right pocket's the spot if one's a bottom.
This goes back to the late 70's, in which the Village Voice teased the NYC gay community for its use of keys, hankies, and other items, hanging visibly from one's pockets, to indicate top vs. bottom. The Village Voice jokingly suggested the use of color-coded handkerchiefs to indicate specific fetishes, such as leather, water sports, fisting, etc.
Well, apparently that very idea caught on, largely in the leather community. You can learn more about the Hanky Code with a Google search; plenty of sites have nice charts, although some charts are a little vague. Not to mention ridiculously convoluted! Light blue vs. regular blue vs. dark blue? Come ON, people! :)
Re: And now the NSFW explanation.
Date: 2006-07-26 04:35 am (UTC)Would it help if the "hanky" was a bandana instead? Because that's the object I was actually thinking of...But I wouldn't want to make it worse.
Learn something new every day.
Re: And now the NSFW explanation.
Date: 2006-07-26 04:42 am (UTC)Re: And now the NSFW explanation.
Date: 2006-07-26 04:48 am (UTC)no subject
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Date: 2006-07-26 05:50 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-07-27 04:02 pm (UTC)Yay OZ!!
He does not get enough love lately:)
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Date: 2006-07-31 04:41 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-07-31 04:33 pm (UTC)BTW I love this!
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Date: 2006-07-31 04:42 pm (UTC)