Arrant Nonsense

Stuck? Stuck! STUUUUUUUUUUUCK *cue crying and massive freakout* Fortunately, we won't need to call the fire department. Unfortunately, the cure for my personal "stuck" won't be as easy as pouring warm water over my tongue.

I am the last person on Earth to flinch from dropping a building on a character's head. I do that all the time (Hi, Ben! And Alex. And Clint. And pretty much every character I've created ever with the possible exception of my spaceship crew, who seem to exist for the sole purpose of screwball comedy), at least metaphorically.

The problem is that this poor guy got the building dropped on his head in the opening scene, and now I don't know how to make things so very much worse for him. I want to. I need to. I just don't know what the Next Thing should be. It's like my Well of Hurting the Crap Out of My Characters has gone dry or something.

This is bad. This is very very bad.

CRUDBUNNIES.

Okay, the fact that the "frustrated" picture for my mood theme is Obadiah leaning over the character played by Peter Billingsly fills me with glee. Just sayin'. I solemnly swear that I did not plan that.

Still with the writing woes. Upload booze. I've got a better handle on my protag (he's very cute, in his "Joss Whedon Is My Master Now" t-shirt), but what he's going to do about the situation he's in is still being...problematic. Gah.

I also come bearing a fic rec: "Puppy Dog Eyes" by unsettledfic. Shameless fluff, in which Sherlock Holmes bonds with Gladstone the bullpup. I died of cute.

And a video from JustSomeRandomGuy: "I'm Twilight, and I'm True Blood."



Direct link.

I just realized that this entire story I'm writing is an exercise in mass cliche-ism.

I guess I need to figure out how to run it face-first into the Wall of Wrong.

Sooner would be better. *drums fingers @ Antubis*

I am apparently in the throes of post-finishing ennui and don't know it. Or something. My new werewolf isn't talking to me and I still don't have much of a Plot for him. Is it Saturday yet?

Really should get off this werewolf kick. But nothing else in the Bunny Hutch is pinging me right now. Alas.

No recent rejections to whine about, although I'm expecting one any day.

Oh, and I guess I should make a folder in my file cabinet for hitman!Ben.

I've put hitman!Ben in first person (in a new doc, because I am not stupid).

I'm not sure it's improved thereby.

Which probably means it's missing something and I need to figure out what that is. In five days (because of my self-imposed deadline).

Crapdoodles.

In other news, I wish to set my uterus on FIRE. Oh, wait, that's not "news," that's a "normal state of affairs," anymore.

Seriously, there's a reason writers drink.

My villain still sucks. "He's just an asshole, okay?" is not enough motivation for a fictional villain. I'm sorry, I know it works in real life, but fiction has to be both better and worse than real life. At least I got my 250 words yesterday, but that's all I got.

Blaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah.

I just realized that my villain has next to no motivation, other than "he's a Bad Guy." See the icon? He hits people for no reason.

That right there? Is a cruddy villain, y'all.

DAMMIT DAMMIT DAMMIT.

Writing is hard. Send booze.

WHEN DID I START SUCKING AT THIS?

Okay, I realize that writing in first person, present tense, is a new thing for me in original fiction. But the rules are the same, dammit. Now I'm going through it and grinding out all the passive construction in the damn thing. I figured out I was doing in the final scene (which was by it was bugging the crap out of me), and so then I went back to the beginning and found out that I've pretty much done it throughout and it's horrible.

But at least I realized it before I sent it out right?

Of course, not before I printed out two copies of it this morning for writing-type people to look at.

GAH.

I'm working on three writing projects: Zombies!, the new!Ben&Janni story, and Chains.

I hate them all.

Upload Southern Comfort, plz. I'm having a "dry spell" in more ways than one, and it sucks.

WHY IN THE HELL is my protag (who is not Stoopid) staying in his tiny town with the power out and no resources anyway? Wouldn't he get the hell out and go someplace like Austin or College Station, which have, you know, great big UNIVERSITIES, and see what they know?

I mean, with the power out in his town and no communication, for all he knows, the rest of the world is dead normal.

I have thought about a quarantine situation, where the Feds look at the OMG ZOMBIES!, which are just in that little town, and say "Nuh-uh, no one gets in or out, and we shoot anyone who tries." O HAI NATIONAL GUARD HOW R U TODAY? So, at least he'd be stuck there for a reason.

Hm. He could get out, with his bitten-but-showing-no-signs-yet daughter, via a dirt road very few people know about, and find out the rest of the world is dead normal. And then the daughter gets loose, and he's personally responsible for the Zombie Apocalypse.

That might be fun.

TOO MANY CHOICES OMG. *bangs head repeatedly on keyboard* alkdfja;lfja;lfakjl;fj I HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATE THIS.