Monday Maunderings.

[agilebrit]

Have a real snippet, this week. I'm cutting it not for length, but subject matter.


After his rescue, he's on Alex's yacht as they're trying to get him used to normal life again (such as it is around them, anyway), and go:

Ben twitched awake from yet another nightmare. He gently disentangled himself from Janni's sleeping arms and slid out of the bed. Sitting up, he scrubbed his hand through his hair and across his face.

He couldn't do this.

Couldn't put Janni through this again.

He dropped a kiss to her cheek and left the room, closing the door softly behind him. A few moments later, he found himself at the rail on the deck, looking at the phosphorescent wake and the stars, considering his options.

Part of him just wanted to end it, here and now. A dive over the side, claws in his throat, and he'd bleed out in the warm embrace of a tropic ocean. No muss, no fuss.

Another part of him rebelled strongly against the notion. Disappearing like that without a word to anyone would devastate Janni and negate all the hard work she'd done finding him and getting him out of there.

But he was wrecked and arguably as crazy as a bedbug. No amount of therapy would ever put him to rights again, and he couldn't ask Janni to sit by his side and watch him descend farther and farther into madness as his brain gave up the ghost for good.

He could leave her a note, he supposed. "Sorry, honey, couldn't handle it, thanks for trying, love, Ben."

Yeah, that wouldn't make her cry, not at all.

And the idea of making her cry over his death was just as intolerable as making her cry over his insanity. He couldn't win. It was enough to make him want to bang his head on the railing.

Ben can't win, and neither can I. You know I love your comments...

Comments

[appomattoxco.livejournal.com]

It's raining yet again. I'm hurting too much to look at anything with an edge right now.

[agilebrit.livejournal.com]

*gentle hugs* Then you don't want to read this. I wish I had something fluffy to send your way, but I apparently don't roll that way anymore.

[garnigal.livejournal.com]

Lovely and sad, with just enough sarcasm that it's still Ben.

[agilebrit.livejournal.com]

I JUST WANT TO SNUGGLE HIM.

Not that he wants snuggling. He wants a TARDIS...

[lady-moriel.livejournal.com]

He does? Man, I'm right there with him, then. Uh, can we see him and someone else geeking out over Doctor Who, then? Because that would be awesome.

[agilebrit.livejournal.com]

Poor puppy:

"Hey, Ben. You all right, man?" Alex asked.
"Not particularly."
"What do you need?"
"For the last two and a half months to not have happened."
"Sorry, my time machine's in the shop."

... I wonder if I could get away with calling it a TARDIS. Because that would be awesome.

[ebenstone.livejournal.com]

It's very, very strong. I'm not overly familiar with the story...sorry, I've got my own fishes I'm frying, though I am trying to be better at this sort of thing...anyway, I love the tone of this. It really works for me...I feel the conflict and desperation he's feeling in this. I can't decide if I like the sentence structure/paragraphing. (It could be a LJ formatting thing.) If it's not...I get it, I just don't know if I like it.

It's very good. I hope that helps!

[agilebrit.livejournal.com]

Thank you! *squints* Ben gets fragment-y when he's stressed, and he's under a hell of a lot of stress at this moment. In fact, this scene should be even more fragment-y than it is.

See, this is why I post snippets like this. Because comments knock stuff loose. :)