*repeats to self*

[agilebrit]

Even though Ben and Alex are played by the same man in my head, they are two very different characters. Alex does run-on sentences when he's stressed. Ben does fragments.

REMEMBER THIS.

I've punched up the scene that's been giving me fits. Split a lot of sentences. And I did it in a separate doc in case it sucked. I don't think it sucks, I think it's vastly improved.


That being said, I'm still not sure I'm pulling this off. I'm trying to tell myself that there's such a thing as Hesitation Marks and that counting down to doing the deed is probably a pretty normal process, but I don't actually know and I'm afraid of Getting It Wrong and I'm also afraid the emotions aren't there (remember, I suck at emotion) and OMGAAAH. Because he's being really cold and methodical about this, so I'm not sure the countdown works, unless it's part of the methodicalness (is that a word? Firefox thinks it is), and I need the countdown so I can plausibly interrupt him and did I say OMGAAAAAAH already?

I thought this writing thing was supposed to be Fun.

Comments

[expectare.livejournal.com]

I've come close to this in real life, and there was no counting for me.

[agilebrit.livejournal.com]

*nods & hugs* It just...flows with the narrative and helps ramp the tension up in the scene. OTOH, that may be a cheat. And I don't know if it's him steeling himself to do something messy and spectacular (werewolf claws through his carotid artery), or just being methodical--and if I don't know my own character's motivation for doing something, this is a a problem.

ARGH.