Hey, look! Spam!

[agilebrit]

"Impress your girlfriend." If I had a girlfriend, that would mean she was a lesbian. I'm fairly certain that my suddenly growing a penis would horrify her, not impress her.

"Too short? We can help!" Actually I'm too tall. Oh, you're not talking about that? FAIL.

"Get bigger between your legs" Um, EW. No thank you?

"Mortgage late!" I ... don't have a mortgage? But thanks for playing.

"Citibank customers, update of info urgently needed!" Well, since I'm not a Citibank customer, I guess this doesn't apply to me.

How come I never get interesting spam? Or is that an oxymoron? I haven't even gotten a creative phishing email in awhile. Although the "MegaDik" and "SuperCum" ones made me snicker.

Comments

[word-smuggler.livejournal.com]

How come I never get interesting spam? Or is that an oxymoron?

If I may be so obvious, I'd say it depends on what strikes your interest.
For instance, in the first few months of the year I kept receiving spam mail with very interesting (fake) senders' names - made up of a random common Italian last name and a random (and improbably uncommon) mythological first name. Mutatis mutandis: imagine receiving mail from "Gilgamesh Brown", "Lohengrin Smith" or "Bastet Jones" - on a daily basis.

[appomattoxco.livejournal.com]

I once got one of those bank scam e-mails from Peter L. Wimsey and one from Ethan Frome. I wonder where they come up with the names. I somehow doubt they read anything.

[bojojoti.livejournal.com]

I am so very tired of penis spam.

[agilebrit.livejournal.com]

I know! I don't even HAVE one! Stop trying to get me to "enhance" something I'm not wearing. GOSH.