Saw the most stupidly infuriating movie last night...

[agilebrit]

I got "Someone Like You" with my free rental coupon I get once a month from Blockbuster. Hey, Hugh Jackman, right? How bad could it be?

As a rule, I enjoy romantic comedies. They're silly, they're fun, and they make me sniffle in a girly way. And the Hubby likes them for the same reasons, although he claims "no sniffling."

This one just pissed me off.

Okay, you have three main characters, Jane (Ashley Judd), Ray (Greg Kinnear), and Eddie (Hugh Jackman). Ray is the first romantic interest, and Eddie is the womanizing foil to Ray.

The problem is that, when we first meet Ray, he's been in a relationship for three years. Does this faze our heroine? Nope, they start dating on the sly. Strike one: Dating a guy who's in a long-term relationship, before he breaks up with her. This made me hate Jane. And Ray.

I mean, really, what did she expect? A guy who will cheat on his long-time girlfriend with you? Will cheat on you. Duh. How stupid do you have to be to not know that? I hate watching movies with stupid characters who are supposed to be smart.

Then there's Eddie. You know what they say in storytelling: Show, don't tell. He gets painted as an "asshole"...but they never tell us why, not really. Okay, he's a huge man-slut with intimacy issues and relationship-phobia. This is a given. That being said, he's completely honest about who and what he is. He doesn't pretend to be a "good guy" and freely admits that he's in it for the sex. Any woman expecting anything different from him (even after she's been warned) is in for a rude awakening. So, they call him an asshole but never actually show him being one--unless being a man-slut = automatic asshole. Strike two.

See, he's not the one cheating on his long-term girlfriend. He's not the one who starts a relationship with a girl, agrees to get an apartment with her, and then leaves her high and dry after she's given up her place and has nowhere to go. Eddie's the asshole? He's looking for a roommate, and Jane goes ahead and moves in with him. Platonically, of course. She wouldn't touch this "asshole" with a ten-foot pole.

Except, of course, that he's the only one in the movie without an agenda.

Only, this doesn't work in real life. Guys like that always have an agenda. Strike three. I like my escapism to suspend my disbelief, not bludgeon it unconscious and drag it off by its hair. Yes, I get that he was wounded and he's really a big woobie just looking for the right girl and blah blah blah. Whatever, man.

You can all predict where this is going. Eddie comforts Jane (with the aforementioned no-agenda other than, you know, comforting his friend), and she realizes that he's the only guy in her life that's honest and caring and she really loves him and we close on a shot of them kissing on the street and spinning around and I think I'll just go over to the corner and throw up quietly.

The only saving grace to this movie was Shirtless!Hugh. Yeah, I can look at that all day. The man is darn near as old as I am and he has a fine physique. *is shallow* Oh, that, and I didn't actually pay money to see it. Having to pay for it would have really pissed me off.

Note to all women: Even though the "asshole" in most romantic comedies turns out to be the "nice guy" -- this doesn't work in real life. "He'll change for me" hardly ever works, k? The Hubby says that "Any guy can fake it for a year. A year and a half is exceptional. Two years? You've probably seen him as he really is."

In other news, I'm on page seven of my random_urges fic and the couple that's supposed to get together hasn't even spoken to each other yet. *headdesks*

Comments

[whirligigged.livejournal.com]

I saw that movie by accident on vacation once, when I flipped on the TV because I was all, "OMG THIS HOTEL HAS CABLE." They were going on and on about cows, and I was like, "...?" It was weird enough that I kept watching. And then just as I was about to change it - Jackman!

Possibly the most unsatisfying romantic comedy I've seen. "Wait - wait, she's in love with him now? When did that happen? Okay, they're kissing, and - WHAT THAT CANNOT BE THE END." Confusion galore!

But, hey, Hugh Jackman in underwear. Worth it? I'm still deciding.

[whirligigged.livejournal.com]

By the way! Are you going to see that movie that I forget the name of? With Hugh Jackman? And he might be a murderer, and there's a reporter trying to get the scoop on him, and hey, I think that's the name of the movie! "Scoop," or "The Scoop," or "Getting the Scoop," or something akin to that.

He's clean-shaven and very un-Wolverine-like, but judging from the previews still manages to be completely fangirlable. :D

Also there was some guy who kept disappearing and reappearing? I...I didn't really understand. If you saw the preview yet, uh, I'm wondering if you got it. I was mostly: "Hugh Jackman! And also a vanishing guy! And...Hugh Jackman!"

[agilebrit.livejournal.com]

Worth it if you don't have to pay for it, I guess. LOL

[whirligigged.livejournal.com]

But I also have to take into account that I will never, ever get those two hours back. ;_; Two hours I could have spent...watching some other crap TV show. *g*

[agilebrit.livejournal.com]

Hm. *IMDB's it* It's called "Scoop," and it's a Woody Allen movie. Those are really hit and miss with me, although "Small Time Crooks" and "Curse of the Jade Scorpion" were hilarious. Haven't seen the trailer yet, although it's available online and I can probably check it out. *goes to look*

[agilebrit.livejournal.com]

Well, I got to eat cookies and popcorn, so it wasn't a complete waste of time. Not like I was doing anything else anyway, since the fic appears to have stalled while Antubis vacations in South America or something. *glares at Muse*

[agilebrit.livejournal.com]

Okay. Looks...intriguing. More Shirtless!Hugh, always a plus. I didn't get to actually hear very much of it (NASCAR is on), but is Scarlett Johansson supposed to be Woody's girlfriend? Man, they're getting younger and younger. Which is squicky. I mean, I realize that he's just finding women with the same emotional maturity he has, but, dude.

[bojojoti.livejournal.com]

Bless you. I wish Hollywood would realize that we want more than a pretty face. I find Ashley Judd very watchable and Hugh Jackman, well, yes, even more so. But, I want the plotline to make sense. I want real characters and intelligent dialogue. Why is that so hard?

"I like my escapism to suspend my disbelief, not bludgeon it unconscious and drag it off by its hair." Preach it, sister. Do I have to watch another show where the group is in trouble, and the first words out of their mouths is, "I think we should split up"? Because, yes, if we are frightened and being hunted the first thing I would want to do is make myself vulnerable.

I have no respect for writers who underestimate their audience.

[unanon.livejournal.com]

This movie is the one with the most horrible of horrible Jackman kisses EVER. It's like a trainwreck from which one can't look away despite the fact that one's eye-sockets are weeping blood at the sheer horror of the grinding, smushed lip-press at the final scene of the movie.

Seriously. It's like one of the ALL TIME epic bad kisses. Jackman is NOT a good kisser and Judd isn't either so the both of them just...*twitches* It's horrible.

*flinches at the memory*

[agilebrit.livejournal.com]

Apparently, in the book this movie is based on, Eddie and Jane don't get together at all. And that would have been much more interesting to me. I realize that for the "romantic comedy" genre, we expect the guy and the girl to wind up in lurrrvvvve, but jumping out of that mold every once in awhile would be refreshing. I mean, sometimes it's dead obvious that these two people should just be friends, you know? And there's nothing wrong with that.

[agilebrit.livejournal.com]

The whole movie is horrible, and that's just the icing on the cake. When I hate two of the three leads because they're lying cheating scum, and I'm defending the man-slut because at least he's honest? Something's seriously wrong with that scenario. *throws case across the room*

[highlander_ii]

*admits to owning this movie b/c of Hugh*

And I actually had more of a comment about this movie, but for the life of me, I can't remember what it was.

However - this is *not* one of the Hugh-fan-faves... (for a NUMBER of reasons) - one person on a board I'm on couldn't get through the movie b/c Eddie is such as asshole... until we told her that he's not like that through the whole film.

Honestly? Nah - not one of my faves, but I *do* like the fact that Hugh's accent is consistant (b/c the director kept the voice coach around for the whole movie)...

oh - I remember what my comment was - Annie Lennox's version of "Train in Vain" - dunno why - but I really like it - the soundtrack for this doesn't suck as huge as some.

*is very scatterbrained - very much needs a vacation*

but mostly-naked Hugh is always a good thing ;)